Anxiety Saga

We haven't had cashews in the house for several years. We enjoy sprouted almonds, as well as sprouted pumpkin and sunflower seeds, but we rarely eat nuts. Recently we were given some raw cashews and decided to enjoy them.

I thought of soaking them first, but my kids were too eager to try them. I took several handfuls as well and went on with my day. Our son with type 1 diabetes enjoyed them as a bedtime snack.

I experienced no ill effects. I felt no digestive disturbance.

I did experience a sudden increase in anxiety, but didn't make the connection.

We went to my kids' school play, where I found myself socially ill at ease. I felt depressed and paranoid.

My anxiety became worse. My heart and mind were racing. I was awake all night wondering why I was suddenly struggling.

"Am I crazy?" "Why am I like this?" These thoughts, as well as curse words, swirled in my head throughout the night.

I checked our son's blood sugar at five a.m. and it was a whopping 325. I reported the number to my husband.

"Must have been the cashews," he said groggily.

I remembered the four handfuls of cashews. Relief. A reason for my madness.

It turns out cashews carry a natural toxic oil called cardol. Roasting the cashews generally takes care of the problem. Raw cashews may or may not contain remnants of the oil. Cardol is a known allergen and irritant.

It took a full day for the anxiety to pass.

The incident reminds me of the intricate connection between the gut and the brain—something often overlooked when diagnosing mental disorders.

French physician Dr. Philippe Pinel noted the connection when he penned these words in 1807:

"The primary seat of insanity lies generally in the region of the stomach and intestines."

Pinel was not only a physician, he was also a psychiatrist and is often described as the "father of modern psychiatry."

More recently, Dr. Michael D. Gershon describes the independent functions of the gut or enteric nervous system, which he says "is a vast chemical warehouse representing every one of the classes of neurotransmitter found in the brain." In his book The Second Brain, Gershon says:

"Cures come when diseases are understood. Malfunction of the enteric nervous system may be resistant to therapies aimed at the head, but therapies aimed at the gut just might work."

I wish I had known this connection earlier in my adult life. Anxiety was my daily companion for many years. I never once considered diet or environment.

Thanks to a radical lifestyle and diet change, I have found relief for my anxiety. Unless, of course, I have a handful of cashews.

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K's Tragedy

She was two months shy of her 42nd birthday. A single mother with three children, living on the East Coast.

I first "met" K on July 8 of 2011. She commented on a blog entry, then emailed me directly.

Wow, thank you so much—you are an inspiration!!! I could not tell if my comments were going through. My brain fog. I have read your timeline on your website about all that happened to you and the kids in Colorado and I am devastated for you and the kids. Thank God you have your husband to help you in this battle, because I am alone. I just don't know what to do and I want to leave the house ASAP because of my kids and their health. To think I am putting them at a cancer risk or other risk is terrifying.

K went on to describe her symptoms. All common with mold exposure.

In retrospect my health has been failing for years and now I have weird thoughts and psychosis/depression/wanting to commit suicide episode a few months ago. My psychiatrist who has treated me unsuccessfully for over a year said it was inflammation and sent me for Lyme testing. I found a great inflammation specialist but of course he does not take insurance. I tested super high for mold allergies. My kids and I are not having as serious reactions as your family but I am terrified. I have the swollen joints, weird thoughts, fatigue, neurological issues with tingling in the hands and feet, profuse panic and anxiety, depression, heart palpitations, brain fog, food allergies, frequent urination, inability to organize and make decisions, liver pain, every little thing makes me upset and stressed, and my cortisol levels are sky high.

She also described issues with her three children.

One has reading trouble and nervousness, another has dizzy spells, anxiety, bed wetting and a few seizure-like occurrences (that happened a few years ago). Another child has anger problems and swelling in the joints. If this is mold our exposure must be less in comparison to your exposure. I think we have a genetic predisposition because I have had asthma and weird rashes as a child. My asthma is better at this stage in my life which is perplexing. I look like the picture of health but I know something is not right and the frustration and stress are also making me sick with worry. I know I have the panic issue and it is so good to talk to someone and get some support.

I am 41 and I feel like my life is over. I was hoping to be remarried, have more kids, get my Masters degree and have a full life. Now I am devastated because what I can do now is limited and I have to take care of the kids. Can there be full recovery from this? Is it okay to exercise since that helps to remove toxins? In this world it is so hard to get the kids to stick to an anti-inflammation diet, and organic is so expensive. Can mold be fully remediated? I guess it depends on the mold. We live in a very humid area. I was always active and fun loving and now I'm not sure if I can even hold a job, and I cry so much. I have been out of work for over two years and when I go on interviews I am all over the place because of the brain fog and I do the dumbest and weirdest things. Really inappropriate and I am having trouble with anger. Should I go back on an exercise regimen? Did you move to Arizona because of the arid environment and to get away from mold as much as possible? I guess that is for the best to be out of a moldy environment because even the outdoor mold can be a trigger. The house is a mess because of my anxiety and disorganization. Is it safe to clean? Please pray God reveals if this is a mold issue as soon as possible and that the kids and I can find a safe place to stay for now until this is all figured out. Also my finances are in collapse because I have lost all my financial resources being out of work for so long and having to pay for testing.

This is so sad because my best friend and the Godmother of the kids lives next door and I hate to move away from her. I attached my resume in case you know of anyone to circulate to in Arizona.

I am going to call the insurance company and let them know over the years I had pipes leak in the house and the toilets overflowed a few times.

Thank you and God Bless!!! I will be praying for you too and I apologize for my upset, but I know you know I am overwhelmed having to fight this. I am trying to give it over to God.

Blessings to you and your family.

K and I spoke soon after this email. She was calm and collected. Kind. Smart. She didn't sound desperate, but in retrospect I know she was. She was willing to do anything to help her kids.

She and the kids left the home. I received this update on September 6:

I am struggling to find a mold-safe place to stay for me and the kids until I can get the house sold. My health seems to be deteriorating with all the stress. I was staying at a neighbor's and I started to have a reaction at her house. My tests for my house came back positive for lots of molds but nothing super toxic like what you have experienced. However with my allergic reaction and immune system it is super toxic. I seem to be most sensitive to aspergillus and alternaria, which are outside plant molds all over here in Maryland. I think God wants me to move to the desert and I am finally figuring this out. It is not healthy to live in this environment given my susceptibility, it will just keep running my immune system down since I am so allergic to outdoor environmental molds. Do you know of any network or anyplace I can stay in Arizona with my kids so we can get well and resettled? This is such an urgent situation and I know you understand this. Thank you and God Bless.

I can't recall if K moved back to the home, but I received this email on February 20, 2012:

Hi Andrea,
How are you? It would be good to touch base with you. I am still having these health/mold struggles. Has your phone number changed?

Indeed my phone number had changed. We connected and she asked if we could offer her and her kids a temporary home. Did we know of anyone who could help? Would I be willing to keep her youngest daughter to help her detox? This conversation took place at the end of March. I ached for her.

I did not speak with K again. Last week I received notice that she had taken her life on April 24. Her sister sent an email to all of her contacts.

I don't know all that went into K's decision to end her life. I do know that toxicity and depression/self-destructive thoughts and actions are connected. I've seen this in my own family. I also know that mold/health battles are lonely ones.

We need an awakening in this country to the reality of environmental illness and its link with mental health. I hope and pray K's story moves us toward that end.

Thank you for reading this. And sharing in the deep pain of this tragedy.

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Anxiety Toolbox

Anxiety and toxicity often go hand in hand. It was one of my first clues that something was wrong. Several of my children became quite anxious while living in our toxic home. Children who were once calm and balanced suddenly fretted about homework or tests. They became afraid of the dark and worried about "little" things. We left our home, and the anxiety came with us.

Psychologist Dr. Robert Crago has seen hundreds of chemical/mold-exposed patients over the years. According to Dr. Crago,

The results of my research on mold toxicity, and the results of others' research on toxicity in general, isolates consistent findings that toxicity affects multiple areas of the brain, but the frontal temporal areas are affected quite consistently.

The frontal temporal areas, and especially the orbitofrontal and the anterior cingulate gyrus, are primarily involved with executive functioning. Executive functioning includes the control and modulation of attention and mood as well as cognitive issues like working memory and planning.

The frontal cortical areas, including the anterior cingulate gyrus, are responsible for inhibiting distracting thoughts and/or filtering emotions while allowing us to be flexible in our thinking. The research suggests that patients who have had toxic exposure with effects to the brain had decreased levels of executive functioning.

My research also shows that only 2 to 3 percent of our patient population had premorbid psychological problems. However, almost all who had been exposed and suffered ill health could now be diagnosed with problems of anxiety and depression. Their problems with anxiety and depression were considered to be caused by organic deficits in brain functioning as well as difficulties in coping with the many significant adjustments they had to make in their lives.

For the first year and a half out of our home I felt a constant ball of anxiety in my chest. A large part of this I'm sure was due to the constant stress and uncertainty. This anxiety has greatly improved. I still experience waves of anxiety, particularly after shopping for any length of time—which I surmise is a reaction to the chemicals and fragrances I encounter.

My kids will be fine one minute and terribly anxious the next. I've also noticed a direct correlation between detoxification and anxiety. The more detox, the more anxiety, at least in our house.

Thus we have learned to cope with the waves of anxiety. Here are some of our favorite and most helpful tools.

1. GABA. Gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA) is an inhibitory neurotransmitter. It tends to make cells less excitable. GABA is the brain's very own source of anti-anxiety medication. Supplementation with GABA can be helpful. One of our favorites is GABA Calm. NutraBio offers an additive-free powder version which can be found here.

2. Bach Rescue Remedy. This is a homeopathic remedy based on the work of Dr. Edward Bach, who left his lucrative medical practice in 1930 to focus on remedies made from plants. An interesting article on Rescue Remedy can be found here.

3. Magnesium. Dr. Mark Hyman is a family physician and founder of the Institute for Functional Medicine. In his article titled Magnesium: Meet the Most Powerful Relaxation Mineral Available, he writes: Anything that is tight, irritable, crampy, and stiff — whether it is a body part or even a mood — is a sign of magnesium deficiency. This critical mineral is actually responsible for over 300 enzyme reactions and is found in all of your tissues — but mainly in your bones, muscles, and brain. You must have it for your cells to make energy, for many different chemical pumps to work, to stabilize membranes, and to help muscles relax.

Magnesium citrate is one of the more absorbable forms of this mineral. We like the Natural Calm brand.

4. Deep breathing. This is tough to do in a heightened state of anxiety but can quickly calm the nervous system if done properly. There's more than meets the eye when it comes to proper breathing. An excellent tutorial is offered by the Institute of HeartMath and is available by clicking here.

5. Hook-ups. This is a simple exercise that helps relax the central nervous system by connecting the electrical circuitry of the body. It crosses the center mid-line to activate both the left and right hemispheres of the brain. A simple explanation can be found here.

6. Epsom salt baths. These utilize the calming effect of magnesium. Epsom salts consist of magnesium and sulphates. When anxiety levels are high, we always see some measure of relief with an Epsom salt bath. Add a few drops of frankincense, lavender, or other essential oil for added benefit.

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